'La sex and the city' dans Bengaluru
The word on the streets is that sex and sexuality have reached fluid proportions. No one is just with one person anymore, no one is just straight, bi or gay anymore,no one is just transgender anymore, there is polyamory, being cis-gender, pan-gender etc and something for our future to contend with, sex with robots.
When I had a crush on a boy for the first time, it was an exhilarating experience. The wait for him to pass by in the corridor, blushing a deep red, trying to catch his eye as he passed a pen and the accidental brush of fingertips sending electricity down one's arm.
But the world has changed dramatically in the time I grew up, which I am hoping dear readers, or even reader, as the case may be, you will understand that,that wasn't too long ago. By the time I hit my mid-twenties, it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep up with this new understanding of the world that seemed to be commonplace among the just 20s set. It was becoming more common, the callousness associated with changing partners, changing sexuality and changing oneself. I thought to myself whether I had become boring, one of the old school set, and it was a disconcerting thought.
We shall desist from talking about love because today no one seems to have time for it, there is an urgency in this new world, about getting the better one, the brighter one, the one with the better boobs, the one with the better abs. There is no effort put into the making and maintaining of a relationship. Much like the cycle of life, most relationships end right after infancy when it reaches the toddler tantrum stage.
And much to my chagrin, the advent of Tinder has expedited this process. The out with the old and in with the new concept. The excitement is ever present when you meet someone new, and even more exciting is when you can actually have a conversation, but wait, there is a clause, one can check out anytime one likes.The psychological impact of it seems catastrophic. The assholes become worse, the ones with self esteem issues go deeper into that rabbit hole and the cycle becomes exemplified.
In a city like Bangalore, the simple act of going out requires days of planning. One has to contend with traffic, the dust, pollution and unwanted human contact. In this setting, long gone are the days when one could go to a bar, strike up a conversation, have that chemical reaction so necessary for the physiological act of 'hooking up'. So now, we turn to technology for solace and anyone who gives us attention or loves us we cling onto.
I wonder, is it loneliness that drives us to cross our boundaries of love and lust? That being heterosexual means I may not find the 'right match' because they may be narcissistic, selfish, pedantic, foolish , sociopathic or worse, psychopathic? Do I then turn to members of my own sex who I know biologically will act and react the way I would? So the very idea of distrust and betrayal and abandonment becomes lesser in intensity? Or if that doesn't work, unlike the days of yore, where I might have contemplated the nunnery I look for life with a robot?
When I had a crush on a boy for the first time, it was an exhilarating experience. The wait for him to pass by in the corridor, blushing a deep red, trying to catch his eye as he passed a pen and the accidental brush of fingertips sending electricity down one's arm.
But the world has changed dramatically in the time I grew up, which I am hoping dear readers, or even reader, as the case may be, you will understand that,that wasn't too long ago. By the time I hit my mid-twenties, it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep up with this new understanding of the world that seemed to be commonplace among the just 20s set. It was becoming more common, the callousness associated with changing partners, changing sexuality and changing oneself. I thought to myself whether I had become boring, one of the old school set, and it was a disconcerting thought.
We shall desist from talking about love because today no one seems to have time for it, there is an urgency in this new world, about getting the better one, the brighter one, the one with the better boobs, the one with the better abs. There is no effort put into the making and maintaining of a relationship. Much like the cycle of life, most relationships end right after infancy when it reaches the toddler tantrum stage.
And much to my chagrin, the advent of Tinder has expedited this process. The out with the old and in with the new concept. The excitement is ever present when you meet someone new, and even more exciting is when you can actually have a conversation, but wait, there is a clause, one can check out anytime one likes.The psychological impact of it seems catastrophic. The assholes become worse, the ones with self esteem issues go deeper into that rabbit hole and the cycle becomes exemplified.
In a city like Bangalore, the simple act of going out requires days of planning. One has to contend with traffic, the dust, pollution and unwanted human contact. In this setting, long gone are the days when one could go to a bar, strike up a conversation, have that chemical reaction so necessary for the physiological act of 'hooking up'. So now, we turn to technology for solace and anyone who gives us attention or loves us we cling onto.
I wonder, is it loneliness that drives us to cross our boundaries of love and lust? That being heterosexual means I may not find the 'right match' because they may be narcissistic, selfish, pedantic, foolish , sociopathic or worse, psychopathic? Do I then turn to members of my own sex who I know biologically will act and react the way I would? So the very idea of distrust and betrayal and abandonment becomes lesser in intensity? Or if that doesn't work, unlike the days of yore, where I might have contemplated the nunnery I look for life with a robot?
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